mommylife

It may or may not surprise you to learn that I met my husband online!  Yep.  No, seriously!

Before I went to Japan I tried out www.matchmaker.com  I did the free trial period and then paid for a month.  It was great fun.  I met a BUNCH of guys and enjoyed the experience.  I decided, upon returning to the States, that I would try it out again, but only for the free period this time.

At that point I was convinced that I wouldn’t end up getting married, that I would be single, and that I was going to DO things with my life.  I had a 10 year plan drawn up in my head and had started putting it on paper.  I was cool with being single, but I wanted to find someone to hang out with, hug, kiss, and just a guy with whom I could be friends plus a little.

I met a couple guys, but wasn’t really into any of them.  (The free period at the time that I signed up AFTER Japan was a total of 3 weeks… 2 weeks without a picture and if you posted a picture you could get an additional week free.)  Most of the guys I met did not see a picture, they just read my short and long answers.  I was completely up front and honest about myself.  When I did post my picture I chose one that did look like me, but wasn’t THE best picture I had to choose from.

After I posted the picture I met a slew of guys, including Jess.  I declined meeting most of them in person.  Right before I met Jess, my hubby, I actually did physically meet one of the guys who’d been writing to me.  That particular guy was really into me and pushing pretty hard for a relationship.  Jess found my profile a couple days later and wrote to me.  I responded to him, which actually broke a bunch of “rules” I’d established for myself.  But as much as I didn’t want to write to him BECAUSE he’d answered a HUGE question wrong, I responded anyway.  At the top of each person’s profile there were a bunch of questions with pregenerated responses that you could choose from.  The question he answered incorrectly was: What are you looking for in a relationship?  His response had been: A One Night Stand.  I was totally NOT looking for that!  But, I wrote to him anyway.  ON TOP OF THAT, after writing back and forth for only 2 days I asked him to meet ME, which I’d NEVER done previously!!!  I actually had a flexible rule that I would write back and forth with a guy for at least a week before meeting him!  Talk about breaking “rules” for this one, eh?!

Believe it or not, he actually told me he couldn’t meet me because he had to laundry!!!  His ship (NAVY) was pulling out the next day and he didn’t have anything ready.  Well, I figured either he really did have to do laundry, or he was like I normally was, and preferred a bit more time to get to know someone online first.  So, I told him I would write to him while he was gone and we’d meet when he returned. He didn’t think I actually would.

He actually turned 21 the day after his ship pulled out.  As a result of our online conversations I knew he liked to write, so I purchased CHICKEN SOUP FOR THE WRITER’S SOUL and made a book jacket for it and wrote a bunch of things inside the book; all as a birthday present that I would give to him when we met.

Obviously, I actually DID write to him for the whole two weeks he was gone.  The guy that was trying to get serious WAY too quickly called me the day before Jess was due to be back in town.  I decided to go out with the guy - mostly because I felt bad for him and didn’t know how to TELL him I wasn’t excited about getting too deeply involved, but also because I was bored and tired of waiting at home for Jess’s ship to get back.  While I was out with that dude, Jess called!  Oh, I was so frustrated and disappointed when I learned that!  I tried to call him right back, but his line was busy.  The internet was in use, I later learned.

I finally did get in touch with him sometime the next day.  We made plans to meet that night at a Denny’s near both of us.  I arrived early because I wanted to feel comfy and be able to see him approach.  I was able to do both.  When I saw him I felt this really pleasant excitement mixed with peace.  Strange, right?  But true.

He came in and I went right up to him to hug him.  When asked where we would like to sit I, a non-smoker, asked for the smoking section (a specific seat) because Jess DID smoke and I wanted him to be comfortable because he’d told me he was really shy.  After he sat down I handed him the book, which I’d kept kind of hidden.  It was only covered by the hand-decorated brown bag cover and a gold stretchy ribbon from something else, but he was SUPER touched.  He was a little misty-eyed when he told me that it was THE most thoughtful gift he’d ever received.  I had a difficult time believing that, but was pleased he liked it.

We spent a few hours eating and talking.  It was pleasant and he didn’t seem shy at all, to me.  I actually closed the meeting/date by telling him that I had to get to the gym early in the morning with my Mom, but we could make plans to get together that day.  He was happy with that and I let him walk me to my car and hugged him goodbye.

Come to find out… Jess almost stood me up that night.  But a roommate told him, “You better go.  You never know, you might meet your soulmate!”  Jess went home from meeting me and called his best friend in Idaho and told him, “I just met the girl I’m going to marry!”  Imagine… he was going to stand me up!!!

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